ROFL
Sounds like something I would do! I HATE spiders. The other day I was in the
garden in my robe and quickly pulled some weeks while sipping my morning
coffee. Felt something crawling on my arm and shed that robe in a heart
beat. Thank goodness my neighbors go to work early, don't like to be caught
in yard in broad daylight in my nighty! (Never did find the spider - or
whatever it was).
Brigitte
The Alternative Pond & Gardens Mart, Inc.
http://www.pondmarket.com.
Martin
Sent: Wednesday, March 29, 2000 8:48 AM
To: GARDENS@LSV.UKY.EDU
Subject: my newest snake story
Yesterday I got real smart and took the electric hedge
trimmer to the ornamental grasses. Yup, just sheared those
things right off and left big piles of straw all over the
place. Very fun and soooooo much easier than doing it by
hand and so much less unweildy than a chainsaw. Quick as a
wink, too, to do a good number of them. Very fun. Almost got
carried away enough to trim the yews, but not quite. (I ran
out of time and it rained.)
Only cut the long orange cord once (yes all the way through
and yes I thought I was being careful and yes I was thankful
it was only the cord and not my leg! and no I did not get
electrocuted maybe because those outlets have GFI? I don't
know, I was grateful.) but that's not the story. I was mad,
it was my longest cord and a new one at that. But that's
not the story either.
The whole time I was cutting the grasses I kept an eye out
for the garter snakes -- I usually see them wriggling and
thrashing about the flower beds on sunny days in the srping
and I like to keep my distance from them -- I like to know
where they are so I don't accidnetly come across them or
step on them or whatever. But I didn't see any and it kind
of slipped my mind.
I did see the robin back again and a pair of cardinals and
thought for a bit that the new kitten had gotten out but
that was only a cat bird and there were some junky (junko)
birds poking around and some sparrows and so on. Squirrels
too, quite a busy place. Lots of new stuff blooming and I
enjoyed myself as I chopped down the grasses and checked on
the things I transplanted earlier this week and tried not to
step on them while I worked....
So anywy as I ambled along in search of another cord,
thinking I'd borrow one from one of the pumps in one of the
ponds -- eyeballing the beds and trying to decide where to
plant some new Jacob's Ladder and some more daylilies and
seeing if any hostas were up yet (yes!) and considering if I
should add even more sedums to the sunny bed and checking
the arabis that's in full bloom.....as I puttered along
quite happily, more or less in search of another cord, I
felt something wiggle up through my left pants leg. Right
behind my knee in the fold of my jeans. Sliggle.
You guessed it -- SNAKE!!!! You can bet I jumped three feet
in the air. What ELSE could that be??? And then I felt it
again. Wiggling. Upward moving for sure. I hate snakes.
So I started to scream. I do not normally scream, no. And
this was not a long scream like on tv. It was that repeated
ACK! ACK! ACK! like in the cartoons and I hopped up and
down, too. I was literally beside myself hopping and
screaming, thinking maybe it would pop out by bouncing. But
it wasn't working and I felt it again and so I quick decided
I had to just rip off my pants to get it OUT, but then the
school bus pulled up at the corner. Quick! I yanked them
back up again and dashed up the steps to the screened porch.
By then still screaming. ACK! ACK! and thinking I would pass
out in fright right there where I was and crack my head open
with nobody due home for hours unless of course it wasn't
just a garter snake and instead something even worse.
Somehow, somehow I whipped those jeans open and ripped them
halfway down just as fast as I could HOW to get them off
over my sneakers but just them OUT popped a piece of
ornamental grass about a foot long.
CRYminnelly.
--
Barbara Martin
en Reports!
http://www.garden.org
Yesterday I got real smart and took the electric hedge
trimmer to the ornamental grasses. Yup, just sheared those
things right off and left big piles of straw all over the
place. Very fun and soooooo much easier than doing it by
hand and so much less unweildy than a chainsaw. Quick as a
wink, too, to do a good number of them. Very fun. Almost got
carried away enough to trim the yews, but not quite. (I ran
out of time and it rained.)
Only cut the long orange cord once (yes all the way through
and yes I thought I was being careful and yes I was thankful
it was only the cord and not my leg! and no I did not get
electrocuted maybe because those outlets have GFI? I don't
know, I was grateful.) but that's not the story. I was mad,
it was my longest cord and a new one at that. But that's
not the story either.
The whole time I was cutting the grasses I kept an eye out
for the garter snakes -- I usually see them wriggling and
thrashing about the flower beds on sunny days in the srping
and I like to keep my distance from them -- I like to know
where they are so I don't accidnetly come across them or
step on them or whatever. But I didn't see any and it kind
of slipped my mind.
I did see the robin back again and a pair of cardinals and
thought for a bit that the new kitten had gotten out but
that was only a cat bird and there were some junky (junko)
birds poking around and some sparrows and so on. Squirrels
too, quite a busy place. Lots of new stuff blooming and I
enjoyed myself as I chopped down the grasses and checked on
the things I transplanted earlier this week and tried not to
step on them while I worked....
So anywy as I ambled along in search of another cord,
thinking I'd borrow one from one of the pumps in one of the
ponds -- eyeballing the beds and trying to decide where to
plant some new Jacob's Ladder and some more daylilies and
seeing if any hostas were up yet (yes!) and considering if I
should add even more sedums to the sunny bed and checking
the arabis that's in full bloom.....as I puttered along
quite happily, more or less in search of another cord, I
felt something wiggle up through my left pants leg. Right
behind my knee in the fold of my jeans. Sliggle.
You guessed it -- SNAKE!!!! You can bet I jumped three feet
in the air. What ELSE could that be??? And then I felt it
again. Wiggling. Upward moving for sure. I hate snakes.
So I started to scream. I do not normally scream, no. And
this was not a long scream like on tv. It was that repeated
ACK! ACK! ACK! like in the cartoons and I hopped up and
down, too. I was literally beside myself hopping and
screaming, thinking maybe it would pop out by bouncing. But
it wasn't working and I felt it again and so I quick decided
I had to just rip off my pants to get it OUT, but then the
school bus pulled up at the corner. Quick! I yanked them
back up again and dashed up the steps to the screened porch.
By then still screaming. ACK! ACK! and thinking I would pass
out in fright right there where I was and crack my head open
with nobody due home for hours unless of course it wasn't
just a garter snake and instead something even worse.
Somehow, somehow I whipped those jeans open and ripped them
halfway down just as fast as I could HOW to get them off
over my sneakers but just them OUT popped a piece of
ornamental grass about a foot long.
CRYminnelly.
--
Barbara Martin
en Reports!
http://www.garden.org
By then still screaming. ACK! ACK! and thinking I would pass
out in fright right there where I was and crack my head open
with nobody due home for hours unless of course it wasn't
just a garter snake and instead something even worse.
Somehow, somehow I whipped those jeans open and ripped them
halfway down just as fast as I could HOW to get them off
over my sneakers but just them OUT popped a piece of
ornamental grass about a foot long.
CRYminnelly.
-----
That is the most hysterical story I've heard in a long time. I have a
deathly fear of snakes, so that made it even funnier. I would have taken my
pants off school bus and all!
Nancy Martin
Woodstream Corporation
Poison Free Pesticides and Traps
http://www.victorpest.com
http://www.havahart.com
Yep, it is easy to forget one's attire when there is a weed to be pulled, a
plant that is peeking through the mulch to be identified, a bloom about to
open......
What is a little too much exposure compared to that? :))
Brigitte
The Alternative Pond & Gardens Mart, Inc.
http://www.pondmarket.com.
Martin
Sent: Wednesday, March 29, 2000 9:46 AM
To: GARDENS@LSV.UKY.EDU
Subject: Re: my newest snake story
> Thank goodness my neighbors go to work early, don't like to be
> caught
> in yard in broad daylight in my nighty! (Never did find the spider - or
> whatever it was).
You mean it's happened before???
(grin)
Actually, I used to eat breakfast and look out at the garden
and wander onto the deck and then into the back yard and
then still forgetting, wander into the front yard. By the
time she was three my daughter would remind me in was still
in my pj's!
--
Barbara Martin
en Reports!
http://www.garden.org
Barbara Martin wrote:
OH Barbara,
What a good laugh! Sounds like my cicada story. I have a cicada
phobia, due to a number of them falling on me and crawling on me
when I didn't know, many years ago. Anyways, I was in my apartment
with three cats who have eaten a hole in the screen door of my
balcony door to go out whenever they felt like it. One day I came
home and towards the evening heard this faint buzzing sound that
was getting a little louder. I realized it was coming from behind
my sofa in the living room! I freaked out because it sounded like
a cicada just starting to buzz. I locked myself in the bedroom
hoping that the kitties would dispatch it soon. Two hours later
the thing was still buzzing.
I called my superintendent and told him to come upstairs, open my
door and get the thing out. He did and told me he couldn't see or
hear anything. Of course, when he was there, the beast was quiet!
So he went home. As soon as the door closed behind him, I heard
the buzzing again. I called him again and told him to get his buns
up here again for the cicada was still here. He came back and
looked at me like I was having a really bad trip from drugs. I was
beside myself, especially that, you guessed it, as soon as he
walked in the door, the buzzing stopped again. He went back home
empty handed again.
I was in panic. There was no way I was coming out of my bedroom
while I could still hear it! So I stayed there all evening and
night, using a jar as a potty. In the middle of the night I was
awakened by this thumping sound on my door. I realized that the
cicada must have been flying into the door. It scared me even more
for it was a pretty loud thump and I was lying there, with my
heart racing, imagining a monstrous cicada the size of a bird. I
cannot tell you guys how horrified I was.
In the morning it was all quiet so I got dressed and literally
dashed out the door without even looking around. I asked a
coworker of mine to come home with me, since I was not going to
make a fool of myself in front of the super again, and help me get
rid of this thing. I gave him my key and instructed him not to
come out until he could show me a carcass of the beast.
He knew me pretty well and about 5 minutes came out laughing his
head off. He told me to come in, assuring me it was not a cicada
but something I really liked. I trusted him and walked into my
apartment, only to find a little BAT, almost completely exhausted,
hanging on desperately to my curtains. I LOVE BATS (and snakes,
too).
We put him in a little box and then released him at night. He was
quite happy to be free again. Poor thing. He was probably
horrified himself having 3 cats dashing after him for 24 hours.
And it was sooo cute, with big ears. Didn't even try to bite me
when I picked him up, he was so tired....I bet the cats had a
night of their lives and are still talking about it.
Margaret.
--
Margaret Dent
"Speed of life increases proportionately to the distance
traveled." MD
"Parenting is like solving a jigsaw puzzle with your eyes closed."
MD
~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^
Margaret Dent Technical Support Specialist
E-mail: dentm@mail.mohawkc.on.ca
~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^
> I would have taken
> my
> pants off school bus and all!
omigosh oh no -- I couldn't do that!
*that* would have offended my sense of decorum !
ROTFLMAO (in retrospect)
--
Barbara Martin
en Reports!
http://www.garden.org
Hi Barbara,
I'm still laughing here. A student went by and said "I see you
sitting there smiling and laughing at the computer. Must be
nice to love your work like that." Ha Ha
We don't have any poison snakes here that I know of and so I've
never been afraid of them - but spiders are my thing - and
one day I was in the parking lot of a mall, and I felt something
crawling on my neck. I shook my head but it hung on. I was
screaming too -- and people were looking at me. I finally put
my hand back there on my neck and found a bobby-pin dangling from
my hair brushing against my neck. My face was flushed, my heart
pounding, etc. I mean I was scared.
I love the electric clippers too. Yea! For us! I only cut the
cord a few times. :)
Best,
June (still laughing)
> Thank goodness my neighbors go to work early, don't like to be
> caught
> in yard in broad daylight in my nighty! (Never did find the spider - or
> whatever it was).
You mean it's happened before???
(grin)
Actually, I used to eat breakfast and look out at the garden
and wander onto the deck and then into the back yard and
then still forgetting, wander into the front yard. By the
time she was three my daughter would remind me in was still
in my pj's!
--
Barbara Martin
en Reports!
http://www.garden.org
How awful!!!!! How funny!!!!! Poor bat!!!!!! (Poor
you!!!!) I hope that was a really good friend. :)
--
Barbara Martin
en Reports!
http://www.garden.org
Barbara Martin wrote:
Yes, he was. He understood completely and we had a good laugh over it.
Plus, I owed him dinner for his "service"... ;-)
Margaret.
--
Margaret Dent
"Speed of life increases proportionately to the distance traveled." MD
"Parenting is like solving a jigsaw puzzle with your eyes closed." MD
~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^
Margaret Dent Technical Support Specialist
E-mail: dentm@mail.mohawkc.on.ca
~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^
Sure -- just make sure my sigfile goes with it. (grin)
--
Barbara Martin
en Reports!
http://www.garden.org
Barbara, that story made my day. Your description was so real. I am
forewarding this on to a couple friends, if you don't mind. They would
just love it. Marg
Barbara Martin wrote:
> Yesterday I got real smart and took the electric hedge
> trimmer to the ornamental grasses. Yup, just sheared those....
--
Me too.
Karen
On Wed, 29 Mar 2000 09:51:14 -0500 "Martin, Nancy"
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That's a great story, even though it was terrifying at the time.
Karen
On Wed, 29 Mar 2000 09:47:53 -0500 Barbara Martin
writes:
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That would still be scary to me.
Karen
On Wed, 29 Mar 2000 10:10:10 -0500 "Dent, Margaret"
________________________________________________________________
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Barbara,
My reaction would have been identical to yours, 'cept the bus wouldn't a
stopped me!!
Linda
PNW WA
zone 7/8
Barbara Martin wrote, in part..
> Somehow, somehow I whipped those jeans open and ripped them
> halfway down just as fast as I could HOW to get them off
> over my sneakers but just them OUT popped a piece of
> ornamental grass about a foot long.
Barbara, this is such a great snake story. It had me going until the last
line and then I laughed out loud! I've seen one snake (a Natrix, water
snake) ever on our property. If there are more, that's fine with me. We
certainly could use something to decrease the vole and field mouse
population. Have never found a snake in the grasses here, but then we burn
our ornamental grasses in the spring. They burn hot, clean and fast...
done in a minute. Although it works for us, the burning method is not
suggested if the grasses grow in congested spaces or in the city.
Linda in NW Ohio near Toledo/Lake Erie, USDA Zone 5
llbs@glasscity.net
Wonderful story... how many times have we all thought something was crawling
on us & jumpedor screamed... only to find it wassomething completely innocent
& nothing to be frightened about. I do it all the time.. but that was a
really funny story.
Marge (`,~)
Marge Macdonald wrote:
Where we live we jump and start brushing if we feel something crawling
on us. Odds are that its fire ants.
George
That is called "formicating," Marge. Note the presence of the "m" in the
word. Margaret L
Really loved it. Thanks. The bus wouldn't have stopped me either ;-)
Carol Hunter
at 6700 feet in Vernon, AZ
Zone 6
In a message dated 3/29/00 3:50:24 PM GMT Daylight Time, martin@MAIL.CVN.NET
writes:
<< You guessed it -- SNAKE!!!! You can bet I jumped three feet
in the air. What ELSE could that be??? And then I felt it
again. Wiggling. Upward moving for sure. I hate snakes >>
Hi Barbara, I just don't know what I would have done had I been in your
shoes! Just after I bought this house I decided to hang the washing out as
it was such a gorgeous day. Went down to the garden level, dashed out with
the laundry basket then ground to halt, had a minor fit, there was this great
brown snake slithering in that s-like way across the paving. It seems it is a
rare and protected species here in Hampshire but as far I was concerned it
was a no-no. I have never really felt at ease ot there since (10 years), so I
do all my tidying early in the spring when I hope the sunbathers won't be
around.
We also get a lot of adders here, but mercifully |I haven't seen one tho' my
neighbour had had one in his garden. These are poisonous snakes and yet the
conservationists have made it illegal to kill them, always supposing you were
brave enough to go near them.
I have just finished cutting back the gorse and stuff that grows right up to
my wall in the hope the snakes will feel to exposed if they come near my
property :-)
Mary in England
Love the story. Was laughing all the way through because, not being
that afraid of snakes, I kept thinking "but a snake wouldn't normally
'climb' up your leg".
A fellow at work was sitting at his desk one day when he felt something
climb up his leg. He suspected an insect of course, and in a few
nanoseconds of thought, reacted. He slapped his leg as hard as he
could. Then he shook his pant legs out....and out fell a mouse (dead)!
Later in the day, he and his office mates were sitting at their desk,
all of them with their feet up on the desk. The Western Region Director
(from Ottawa) walked by with the site Director and saw the scene. It
was hastily explained that all was not as it appeared....to which the
Directors probably thought "geesh, these guys are what give government
workers a bad name"!
Brenda
I know that feeling exactly. I tiptoe veeerrrryy carefully
past the spot where I nearly stepped on a copperhead. They
are one of the poisonous snakes we have here. The other
possibility is the timber rattler but so far I haven't seen
one of those. ick or maybe I should say ACK!
--
Barbara Martin
en Reports!
http://www.garden.org
Heck, logical is way too boring....I may be logical about snakes and
mice, but there are other things that send me!
Brenda
Barbara Martin wrote:
I thought it was women who had the reputation of being afraid of mice?
Another cliche bites the dust!
Karen
On Thu, 30 Mar 2000 15:23:08 -0700 Brenda Pink
writes:
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> Love the story. Was laughing all the way through because, not being
> that afraid of snakes, I kept thinking "but a snake wouldn't normally
> 'climb' up your leg".
But neither would a piece of grass.
I never claimed to be logical. :) LOL
--
Barbara Martin
en Reports!
http://www.garden.org
Margaret L... interesting word... had to look it up. How did you know that???
Barb, my Dad was freaky about snakes, but hated to admit it. He never
missed work, even went to work with his pajamas under his clothes when he
had bad poison ivy, itching and draining and icko. But the morning he
started off to work (walking), stepped over a small irrigation ditch and
felt something like a stick thrust up his pant leg, shook his leg and out
came a snake, he came home white and shaking, and missed half a day of work
that day. The bottom line is it feels like a twig. I'm not fond of snakes
either, and no school bus would deter me from getting to the bottom of
things. Margaret L
Bet it was dodder, George. Margaret L
margaret lauterbach wrote:
You wouldn't make it in SE Texas then. When I was a boy (should I have
started this story as "Long, Long Ago, in another land?) we had some
kind of weird weed that was in our fields. Put long orange runners up on
top of the other weeds and when you walked through the field these
things would creep up your pants legs. Used to scare me to death but Dad
would mow the field. Mom went out there one day for some reason and
right after she came screaming home shaking her pants legs Dad mowed.
Haven't seen that stuff in years and don't remember the name of it if I
ever knew it. We just called it creep weed.
George
All these snake stories just might keep me out of my garden! Aaahh! We
just bought a house and can't move in until the end of May. I might take
this year just to see what comes up and what's planted where. Plus, I might
spend some time gauging any snake acitivity after hearing all this!
Nancy Martin
http://www.victorpest.com
http://www.havahart.com
http://simpsons.about.com
Do you meant to tell me this really could happen and it
really does feel like that???? holycow pardonmyfrench now I
am really going to be paranoid.
--
Barbara Martin
en Reports!
http://www.garden.org
George Shirley wrote:
Have no idea if it is the same plant, and certainly don't know the botanical name
for it, but I recall seeing something similar in the Caribbean. It was a pretty
bright orange, and kind of straw-y looking, climbed on in top of may things, and
I saw it once or twice on utility lines. The folks I asked called it
'grandfather's beard'.
Joan
It's field dodder, Cuscuta spp. Member of the Convolvulaceae family.
Margaret L
botanical name
> for it, but I recall seeing something similar in the Caribbean. It was a
pretty
> bright orange, and kind of straw-y looking, climbed on in top of may
things, and
